Career Development Plan - How to not feel Jealous in Ballet

Career Development Plan - How to not feel Jealous in Ballet

Odette,

Hi, its Orla again! I just really need to someone to talk to that will understand. I know a girl who is at the Royal Ballet School and whenever she is brought up in conversation I suddenly get a prick of envy; is this normal? I hate jealousy, it is so ugly, but i feel so helpless about my dancing. I wish I was able to go to a professional ballet school as I so want to be a dancer but I know that they wouldnt be able to see past by unsatisfactory turnout, exibility, unarched feet and my height. I feel so out of place when i attend summer schools or auditions, where the girls are tiny and bony and extremely flexible. I practice and work hard but I want to be EVEN better. What should I do?

===========================================

Reply by Odette
To:- Career Development Plan - How to not feel Jealous in Ballet

Hi Orla,
Thank you so much for your message. It's so good to let out your honest feelings and get it off your chest, because it can really help to just understand your thoughts and have someone to talk to.

You always need this support as a dancer, I certainly did. It was especially my dad who I could rely to encourage my thoughts and build my mental attitude to let me continue in a positive direction. In ballet, this is crucial especially when you have so many situations where you can be too hard on yourself and feel deflated. But you mustn't give up and keep pushing yourself to believe in your ability.

For you, I am always here to listen and help you love forward so don't ever feel afraid to speak up!

Ok, so jealousy is always a feeling that can be there in dancers. There are always situations where you friend gets chosen and not you, or someone else gets the place in a school which you so desperately wish for.

Firstly, you have to remind yourself that it won't help your situation right now by always comparing yourself to your friends or wishing you were doing the same.

It is normal to feel like this, but remember YOU are on your own journey as a dancer and there will be opportunities that are right for you. Every dancer does get their moment, but the grass isn't always greener on the other side. Maybe in a few years time, your friend will change schools or be forced to stop dancing. There are surprising paths that happen for the friends that you admire or wish to be like.

It is good you have a driving energy to be better and strive for more. If your situation right now is not helping your desire to become a dancer, then what can you do? Can you audition? Have private coaching?

As a dancer you always have to think for yourself in terms of what actions you are going to take. Nothing will happen if you just hope and wish, you have to be determined enough to find a solution and keep positive that it will happen for you.

Most importantly, don't be so hard on yourself that it makes you feel useless or not good enough. Start now to build up confidence and a strong mentality!

Best wishes,
Odette